Yesterday I was invited by the 大力廣播 (Deep Tissue Radio) for a interview at Los Herederos radio station. The station is inside the subway station, underground right at the Jackson Heights–Roosevelt Avenue in Queens. It's very funny when we're talking live on radio, people would passed by and look into the glass window, as we're the animal in the zoo. It's also very special that normally we thought the radio station usually situated in a well sound proved studio. However, because the LH radio is right above the subway, we can hear the sound of the train, the squeeky metal sound of the track, and all of the noise from the outside if someone is blasting their music from a giant JBL bluetooth. They're heard in our headphone and together with our conversastion broadcasted locally and globally. I feel so pleasure to be hosted by this space and the people, knowing their value and the community built with art, music, and stories. It remind me of the time when I visit the Wave Farm radio station at Catskill this summer when I was during the residency at Art Omi. The radio wave, the transmitting signal, the channel that's been inhabitated with people who create a alternative reality, a fertile land fueled with ideas and care, a imaginary sky that everyone can fly their kite.

I am at this moment forced to mute myself from the world that I can expose to brutal and inhuman power and danger for being questioned about my exsistence. But also at the same time see my photo as an artist being promoted on the social media, and I have to tell myself that I don't know this person, or feel so bad to realize there is still an expectation from the outsid world for me to perform professional and creative and alive. How can a person celebrate and dance with their masks on and legs being tied? But I know it is just a monster inside my belly and brain. I am grateful to be continue meeting people.

I went to the Met yesterday, a Saturday night. This photo I took of a letter still strikes my mind. It a letter Albert Einstein wrote to the artist Si Lewen. I didn't expect to see Lewen's painting at the Met. Its displayed at a hallway between European arts.

"It had often been said that art should not be used to serve any political or otherwise practical goals.....It is true that it is utterly wrong and disgusting if some direction of thought and expression is forced upon the artist from outside."

I am right now going on a process that I wouldn't imagine how frustrated and stressful and terrible it is at the moment I decided to stay here in this country and throw all my money plus extra borrowed from my family and friends. I was very innocently believing that the path I choose is to support me as a artist, but I am more and more aware that the process want the artist to be a politician. Yes it is disgusting to put my art and everything i done in a language that are only gonna make sense with numbers of millions, "New York Times", "extraordinary", "lead and critical". Nothing else really matters. And you better not try to preserve any empathy or humanity in your statement.

I try not to complain, appreciate the help I get, appreciate the community that support me, I try not looking at the dirty side of the administratio, I try to stay hopeful, try to be chill, try to prepare for the future pretending I've already been given the permission to stay and work, try to believe truth is telling its truth. I try to seperate myself into two, for being the politician and the artist. I try to protect the artist part of myself. and it truely cut my whole person into pieces scattered on the concrete floor where my brain and my heart were exposed. There's no way for me to not looking at the mirror and admit that I just choose the path of being a politician and artist, and it doesn't matter whether or not I want to.

I am truely grateful, from my heart and gut, for having every, many generous help I got. And I am very sorry, for being so sure that what I've been experiencing is what has been happening throughout the history, throughout every corner in the world, beyond the reality that I can only imagine. I am sorry for myself and at this point don't feel proud of being an artist becuase the proud I have to gain sacrifice so much of my honest and trust and kind and belief. A lot of tears.

It is everywhere. Discrimination is still silently here and there.

High Zero Fest is phenomenal. I was lucky to play a show with Tom Boram in 2025 at the Firehouse. Tom therefore invited and nominated me to be part of the 2026 high zero. Besides all these great music and weird sound in these four days, it's almost a healing experience for me to meet these geniune human beings that makes me feel that my existence matters. My existence matters. The existence doesn't soley mean to be present in a place within the time, but is also means that I am part of a body of making, materializing, contextualizing, realizing, celebrating, and frustrating. I now see the performance I do as music rather than sound, becuase I can never be an individual making sound, I've been always as part of multiple collectives creating meaning and languages through sound. Existence. Breathing. I inhale the dust and moist in the air. I precious the meeting, and I acknowledge my existence. Especially thanks to Davu, Mike, and Brenton for making that impossible set happened. Thank you Maja, Majid, Lexie, Lemuel for your sincere spirit and sound. Thanks to so many people that come to talk to me. Baltimore is cool.

On August 13th 2026, sun was touching the ground, leaving pinky marshmallow in the sky. There were 13 human beings and 1 dog from different motherlands, riding the marshmallow and meeting at a barn inside a wood. They all had more than two hands, holding some kind of sonic objects that keep creating sound and noise that looks shiny, like stars, and like silver lake when sounding all together. The sound they made changed the dimension of time, like a babka bread. The dance underneath their feet awakened the deep roots of the land. Their voice vibrated the tree so that the apples fell, only the deers knew. They left the wood on August 31, 2026. Their dairy and secret were all written down on the parchment paper underneath the dairy free vegan chocolate cookies. You can not see their presence, its not on the internet world. The only way to connect with them is through telepathy. If you are genuine, cute and successfully connected, you'll first hear their music. When you open your eyes, a dog and a deer behind the apple tree will be looking at you from distance, and you'll be surrounded with food and dance.

I play the Artifact series in Brooklyn, alongside id m theft able and Gryphon Rue. It was so amazing to experience a show that brings all my old friends, family, and people who I've been long admired togehter in the space at that night. I love sound and music because it holds us together. id m theft able lend me his merch to put underneath my daxophone to prevent the feedback from the sub in front of me. Thank you hero.

Spending time on the Peeks island during my residency at Open Systems Studio is an unforgetable and rewarding experience. I woke up at 4 on my birthday to see the first sunrise from the island.

I was at the Campbient residnecy. This is my team in a huge tent working on field recording and music.

Oreo Cookie Therapy (femi and huichun) released their first album today on Bampcamp!!!

Endgrain (Jake and Huichun) played the Non-Event in Boston.

I put the leather embedded with gyroscope on the back of my feet and suddenly had this idea of making a gyro sandals so that I have to dance while I play.

Now is the midnight of the 30th. Few hours later, there is going to be a strike in Manhattan in New York. Everytime when there's some social movement like this that is indirectly but strongly related to me, I feel conflict and upset because all I can do is hide behind the scene and stay away from the crowd so that I won't risk being recognized by government or accidentally be arrested, like what others have experienced. My foreign status on this land is preventing me to socially engage in some communities, and I hate to realize I've been being as a outsider, and could only be an outsider when there's a need to speak something out. I hate to be transparent, and I hate to mute myself, I hate that I had to protect this unrooted, ungrounded legal thing in order to stay with my people and keep doing art. This is not an artist I wish to become. Is this a privilege of being able to be a I-don't-care person and live a decent life, or is it a curse of not being able to say and act for what I care about and hold the sense of belonging? Creating art is a privilege.

I was asked few questions during an interview and I didn't answer it as I wanted and can't stop thinking of it, so I want to answer it again in my journal and give my self a relief.

How do you see your sound sonically?
I am interested in the subtlety and the textural sound between my skin and the instruments. I found myself fascinated with the in-between sound, where the material becomes more than just the wood, the balloon, but even sounds like a bird, an animal, sounds from a creature's guts and throat, and a scream from the deep sea. Even the metal can translate the shape of my throat and vowel into words from ancient worlds or a witch's hum. Those sounds give me a black box space to imagine the real of matters, the reality behind the limitation of my sensory, the reality beyond what I can see, hear, smell, and touch. I believe a more-than-this world within every matter I've met.

What are other things you don't usually mention but are great inspiration to your work?
I was really into the idea of agential realism and quantum entanglement by Karen Barad, parallel worlds, out-of-body experience, serendipity, and a lot more theory where today's science and technology can not fully explain but can become so alive, tactile, excited, and feel hopeful, yes, I feel hope everytime when talking about these with another who also gets the ideas. Although these are mostly thought experiments, they greatly inspired and led my body to feel and create things that are always creating space for me to imagine living in another parallel reality. Through those weird theories, I create sound and treat my performance setup like a ritual practice for myself to get close to these more-than-this worlds. The key for those doors is through body, movement, and sound.

I played at the FEEDING TUBE RECORDS with Matt Robidox!!! so grateful to be here, otherwise I would never know this legendary place.

I invited Dan to play the contact improv jam with me together. It felt very comfortable and safe to have a accompany with me. Dan is so amazing on whistling.

This was Tom Borax on his quad set with lamps at Firehouse in Worcester. Oreo cookie therapy was on the bill too!

Today I've been thinking of what is my value of being a sound perfomer. I realized I've been developing my set up from playing digital sensor and computer to using wood and building instrument, from using digital reverb to playing acoustically and spacially, from using microphone for vibration through air to using contact mics for vibration through touching, from sitting on chair and putting geers on table to sitting and lying on the ground and walking down stage, from playing using hands to breathing, touching, and using my feet as the main control, from playing solo to duo and jam with instrumentalists, modular artists, and vocalists. All these practice are unconsciously and gradually lower down my body position and getting closer to the ground, the space, and with my audience and wider range of sound. All these process has been making me more and more invisible and taking me away from the spotlight on the stage. Having a sit, holding a mic, voicing through loudspeakers mean having power that registers my existence in a uncomfortably higher level. I realized my lack of confidence is because this is not the kind of confidence I would like myself to have. It is just not the value my body would react comfortably. The transformation of my sound performance has been making closer to myself instead of more fitting into what has been taken as experimental sound in a dominantly way either throughout the history of computer music or within the crazy medias and internet nowadays. I feel grateful to realized and wrote these ideas down today.

oreo cookie therapy played at lost bag in providence. Femi and I actually wanna play show with people from downstairs doing Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu.

I play with thc-xlr at the electric meter in Providence.

I played the Experiments in Electronic Sound Festival at CalArts in Valencia, CA. It's so wonderful that I met talented artists. We appreciated each other's work, and we hang out like we went to the same school in collage for years.

I have been working on solar sounder project since last month. Femi taught me how to do the paper circuit by Peter Blasser. This is the first time that I really feel soldering itself can be an art piece that holds messages and thoughts. It made me start to think of my relatiobship with all these electronics in a different ways. How do they wanna be? What kind of body they like? How much my SELF should be attached on it? And then I made a 2*2 cm mini sculpture out of solder wire cause I got bored.

I was working with Daniel since the past few days, helping with sanding and oiling the dax, in exchange for having my own daxophone. It is also hanging out with Daniel that I know the word "creative capitalism".

today i hang out with friends at ponyhenge. we bring acoustic and batteryed instruments and jam. my arbrasson was broken when we're playing. i'm a lil sad but also happy for it because it died at this adorable place and were surrounded by these people i love so much during sunset. thank you for playing some amazing shows with me. i'm gonna make a new one soon.

Today I worked on my website and figured out how to load the nav bar dynamically. the whole thing is difficult than i thougt but really satisfied after i figured it out.

orea cookie therapy performed at the Lost Bag. me and femi loved our set. its the fresh one for both of us. femi's arbrasson was broken before the show. but we love our set so much.

tyring new thing with pressure, breathe, movement, body, wave, voice...

Non-Event @ First Church in Jamaica Plain, May 16 2025. i have to say i am so lucky that my set at pity polar with femi was seen by Chris, so that i was invited to play a Non-Event series, and got the chance to meet Laura Cocks, who is the most amazing flutist i've ever heard. i can never forget that Laura said to me: we address our breath in different ways...balloon is like a geographical site that you give access to people to witness your struggle and vulnerability....and we both stopped talking because we're gonna cry. it was a beautiful night.

Residual Noise @ RISD SRST, April 5 2025. i played balloon with 29 channels ambisonic deme shpae speaker arrays at RISD's Studio for Research in Sound and Technology. the sound in the space, or the space shaped by the sound is so alive, all of the movement is right here. sometimes you can not ignore the power of good quality technology supported by academia that are sometime not align with the idea of diy community. i think it is nice to be in both group and be in the in-between.

I played mouth harp at the Algotrek with bare feet on the ground. I sit on the same level of ground with everyone else. I couldn't describe how tranformative experience this is.

orea cookie therapy performed at pity parlor. This show was the beginning. It was my first duo set with Femi, my first time performing in a noise venue in Boston. That night led to an invitation from Chris Strunk to play a Non-Event show. None of this would have happened without another balloon vibrating beside me, and without a space that brings people together (thank you Janet). Luck can’t explain everything—but I’m so lucky to have them around me. I also started learning to be confident and comfortable in noise and improvisation aer playing with Femi. Just being aware of each gesture and staying in flow with sound is already a kind of miracle.